Meet the Critic

I’m the girl who sits in the back of the movie theatre alone (creepy? kinda…but oh well) I used to sit in the middle, dead set in the middle, until I heard this urban legend in a movie about a guy who would sit behind people at the movies and stick them in the neck with a needle full of poison. The person would slowly die in the dark theatre and no one would know until the lights came on…(paranoid, maybe. If you knew my mother you would understand) I like going to the movies alone, it allows me to focus and get caught up in a film (and I don’t like when people talk to me and ask me questions.) I equip myself with two very important things: popcorn (lightly buttered) and my flask of vodka (unless I’m at a certain theatre that sells booze and beer). I get there for the previews, I sit through the credits, I appreciate all there is about going to the movies. Oh and I don’t like comedies. I like satire, dark comedies, awkward laughter, inappropriate humor, laughing at the wrong time, inside jokes, mockumentaries, and a well written joke now and then. But slap stick comedies aren’t my thing – I don’t like romantic comedies either. I like smart movies that don’t try to hard, movies that win awards, indie films, foreign films, and anything quirky. That being said I’ll see everything once – but not always in the theaters, and not always on the first try. I’m not a movie snob, I just don’t like bad movies.  So if you ever see me in the back of your theatre, come say hi! But then leave, don’t sit directly next to me – that’s weird. And please don’t sit directly in front of me, I like to put my feet up on the seat.  That’s splicegirl in a scene, pleased to meet you.